Dr. Willis Newman, Esmeralda Newman, bible-teaching-about.com

My husbands family?

by Mrs. Johnson
(Tulsa, ok)

My husband and I are a young couple. Only been married for a year now. I be will be 22 this September he will be 26 in the same month. We have 3 beautiful children. 1 in which is his from a previous relationship, 1 that is mine from a previous relationship & 1 that is ours together, she is our only girl and the newest member to the family...Long story short. My husband & I never grew up in church or been around Godly people, as a matter of fact, we grew up around the complete opposite. But 2 years ago God called us to his house & we have been trying to live right & have been going to church faithfully ever since.

My husband has a big family, unlike me. His family is filled w/ sinners, drunks, gossipers.. the list goes on. From his mother to his father to generations above and beneath them. Lateley they have been talking down on me & our marriage. They have been making up lies and story's about me & about our marriage. These things hurt me because I am a loyal, (and a) good woman of God, & always try to help the next person and do what I know God wants me to do.

Recently I just cut everyone in my husbands family off. I deleted them from my facebook page & i do not talk to them or his mother anymore. I told myself that these people do not deserve my loyalty, honesty and joyful personality. I cannot deal w/ the way they treat me & the things they say about me. My husband is a good man he knows God. Maybe not exactly where I want him to be in Christ, but he is a man of God. I explained this problem to him & he told me he understands and he will never let his family talk about me in front of him or disrespect me. But they have a family reunion 3 times each year, meaning i have to continue to see and put up w/ their ways. They are a bad influence on my husband & too negative towards our marriage. I want my husband to cut them off to realize that we should not be around people like that family or not.

God says people are supposed to respect marriage& they do the total opposite. What should I do? & did I do the right thing by cutting them off?

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Dec 28, 2014
Feeling your pain
by: Anonymous

My mother in law hates how independent I am compared to the other in-laws because their opinion s are easily swayed by money or expensive gifts. She wants us to live where she live do what her and her husband do and only talk to her family and cast mine off. She even hates what kind of church I go to. I refused to do so because that is ridiculous expectations for anyone to have. I tried to be nice and meet her half way but she wouldn't do the same for me. Our jobs are not city friendly and took us to the other side of the state (wasn't planned just happened). Six months before the wedding she was calling my husband telling him to break up with me and at rehearsal she caused a ruckus using her daughter and completely ruined our wedding and then stole my dress afterwards. My pastor told me about toxic relationships. Then we went to a christian counselor who told us to stop contact until they resolve their problems. Things will work out the way they are supposed to just work on yourself and your relationship with your husband. That is all you can do.

Mar 14, 2012
My husbands family
by: Anonymous

I am also experiencing the same thing but in my case its not everyone in my husbands family.its 1 of his sisters and just his mom.

This has been going on for quite some time.
But it just got worse when his sister made some negative comment about my brothers death.
I was not happy about what she said i tried to forget about it.
Until his mother has been making some negative comments about my marriage and they were both together and discussion,conspiring about my marriage.

I ended up confronting them well in a manner that i believe was not rude.actually i just sent her an email that i dont like what she said to me when my brother passed away ,also what she and her mother have been discussion about my marriage.

My sister inlaw reacted very negatively to this,and told the other sisters that support my statement.

what just makes it worse i feel like theres a cloud of conflict in my husbands family.the other sisters will call me and gossip about the other ones and she is hurt by her mothers favouritsm .iam stuck.

Did i do the right thing because now my mother inlaw and the other sister inlaw are not talking to me.

Sep 10, 2011
You are not alone...
by: Anonymous

My family is full of sinners, too. You cant ask him to cut them completely off. However, you can distance yourselves from them. Be polite to them, and if they be disrespective ...leave their presence. Pray for them. Ask God to show them the way. Trust me in time, they will ask you about the good God you serve......just do not sink to their level by argueing, or name calling. This makes them right......treat them with kindness....and a long stick!!!!

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